


Miscarried

by Toaverse



Category: Onward (2020)
Genre: Alternate Universe, Angst, Angst and Tragedy, Baby Death, Character Death, Child Death, Childbirth, Death in Childbirth, Flashbacks, Fluff and Angst, Gen, Heartbreak, Little Fluff, Magic, Miscarriage, Reunions, Stillbirth
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-12-28
Updated: 2020-02-01
Packaged: 2021-02-24 22:55:08
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 2
Words: 3,245
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22005811
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Toaverse/pseuds/Toaverse
Summary: the death of her husband took a tole on Laurel. But she didn’t know that it will result in her unborn son’s passing a month later...An AU where Ian had been miscarried.
Comments: 1
Kudos: 129





	1. The miscarriage

**Author's Note:**

> Boi was this sad to write...
> 
> It was so sad, it isn’t even funny :(
> 
> Welp, enjoy this sad fic...

The weekly prenatal visits have started for Laurel Lightfoot. Well, for a second time, then.

The female elve was pregnant with her second son for about 38 weeks, and she was at the hospital for another routine check up. The father wasn’t there because he passed away a month ago, which Laurel was still quite sad about. However, her first son, Barley, was in the room, sitting on a midwife’s lap, watching his mother.

Laurel remembered the room that she is in, also being there last time. She’s also speaking to the same centaur nurse last time.

She then noticed that the room had gone quiet. Laurel looked up at the nurse who’s expression has changed from happy, to worried. She was trying not to give anything away while searching for something around Laurel’s stomach.

“I-i’m going to get a doctor quik...” the nurse said worried, looking pale as she quikly left the room.

Alot of emotions came upon Laurel. Panick, nervousness, worry. But she clinged to the hope that it may be a technical error. That they maybe forgot something, whatever that is.

The midwife that watched Barley didn’t even dare to say anything, let alone ask what was going on.

The nurse was gone for quite a long time. It could’ve been minutes, but it felt like a million hours in Laurel’s eyes. But the nurse came back with a troll doctor.

“Mrs Lightfoot, it apears that you have a...” the doctor couldn’t even bring himself to finish his sentence. It was just too heartbreaking for him. “I’m sorry... but your baby is gone...”

That one sentence sended Laurel into a state of silence. All she could hear is ringing. Nothing more. Until the awfull realization that her unborn son had died before he even had a chance to live...

And that’s when she wept...

They have to prepare for labor. In an attempt to stop the screaming, The nurse put morphine into Laurel’s system.

The ride to the delivery room was just a whole blur.

All Laurel could see was lights going past her. But she saw nothing...

What she could hear was the centaur nurse trying to calm her down. But Laurel heard nothing...

The only thing that she can see and hear, was the painfull silence where her baby boy’s heartbeat should’ve been...

•+•

Laurel was in labor for 14 tortures hours. 14 hours to deliver a stillborn...

When he was finally out, seeing a glimps of him, and then him being taken away from her. It felt like it nearly killed Laurel...

But the doctor brought him back. They let her hold him, her son. Despite the drug effects, she could still feel the awfull pain as she didn’t saw him moving. He didn’t cry or scream. He just layed in her arms, completely still and quiet...

Looking at her stillborn son in her arms, the emotions inside Laurel took over as she started crying, questioning herself of how it has come to this.

“Mommy! Mommy! Is he here?” It was Barley. He came running to the bed where his mother is laying in, excited to meet his little brother.

‘Shit!’ Laurel thought. How is she gonna explain this to Barley? She remembered him being so excited when his mother first said he’s going to be a big brother. How he would talk to her belly after he got from school.

He would be so heartbroken to hear that he isn’t getting a baby brother after all...

Laurel then got slowly out of bed, still holding her stillborn son. She got with her knees on the floor, in front of her oldest child. “Wanna hold him?” She barely manages to ask without sounding upset.

Barley nodded excitedly. His mother then places her new born son carefully into his big brother’s arms.

As Barley was holding his baby brother, he felt a slight tickle on both his arms, but didn’t really pay attention to it. “He’s so tiny!” The 4 year old elve said out of fascination, having never seen such a small elve before. Laurel couldn’t help but smile a bit at the comment.

“Mrs Lightfoot.” The doctor apears to be in the room too. “It’s time...”

Laurel’s expression immidiatly changed into a sad one. Both her, as Barley, have to let him go now...

She carefully took the stillborn out of her oldest son’s arms. As she stands up, she took Barley up. holding him in one arm while carrying her newborn in the other.

Laurel eventually stood in front of the troll doctor. 

She gave one last look at her baby boy, before handing him over to the doctor...

It was absolutely tortures for Laurel to see the doctor leave the room with her stillborn baby. When they where out of the room, the tears came again in the female elve’s eyes.

Unknown to her, the satyr midwife that looked after Barley was in the room too, all though not that long. And this time, she dared to ask something.

“What where you going to name him?”

Laurel looked at the midwife, holding her son close to her, and still having tears in her eyes.

“Iandore...”


	2. Through a picture

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A 16 year old Barley finally meets his father, but it becomes immediate clear that someone is missing from the picture.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Boy oh boy oh boy....
> 
> Finally had the time to write the second part of this story.
> 
> It’s probably even more heartbreaking...
> 
> Enjoy *sniffs*

“...but I hope there’s a little magic left...” the voice of the deceased father sounded through the recorder. “...in you.”

Barley sat with full attention to the sound of his father’s voice, as the recording ended. ‘That was my father...’ he realized.

He then took another look at the letter that his father wrote. “I created this spell to see how my boys grow up to be.” Was the last sentence of the letter. ‘Boys? I’m an only child. I don’t have a brother.’ Barley thought to himself.

“It must be a grammar error.” Where his mother’s words when the 16 year old elve first noticed the last sentence. ‘It has to be a grammar error. What else could it possibly be?’

Then there was that strange salutation at the beginning. The salutation read: “Dear Barley” with two words crossed out in between the word and name. The words where so crossed out, to the point where they where unreadable.

But despite those two noticeable things, Barley didn’t think anything of it. He just wants to meet his father again. Well, if the staff lets him...

The staff was already in the elve’s reach. Literally right next to him. And before Barley knew it, he had the wizard staff in his hands and was preforming the spell.

The small and light things started to fly everywhere in Barley’s room, as the magic started doing its thing. Eventually, the spell started the proces of bringing his father back. As the proces went on, the spell uses more and more power, which made Barley hold the staff tighter. 

‘Just a little longer...’ the 16 year old elve encouraged himself. ‘For dad!’

He didn’t know how long it took, but the proces stopped. The spell over all stopped. As Barley looked at the result of the spell, he saw him...

Right in front of him stood his father, looking exactly the same as in the picture.

A strong, and a bit of an awkward silence hang in the room, as father and son looked at each other for the first time after more then a decade.

“Hey...” Barley said, breaking the silence in the room.

“Hey...” the older elve said after.

Then both elves formed a smile on their faces, before Barley ran up to his father for a hug, which he immediately accepted by hugging his son back. Tears of happiness formed in both elves eyes as they embraced.

“I missed you, dad...” Barley manage to get out through his sniffs. He had done it. He had his father back. Well, for the next 24 hours at least.

“I missed you too, Barley...” his father replied. To be completely honest, he didn’t remember anything else after he died, but that doesn’t mean he didn’t miss his family.

It took another minute for the two to end the hug.

“Where’s your little brother? Is he doing okey?” The older elve suddenly asked. The question put a very, very confused look on Barley’s face.

“W-what?” The 16 year old almost couldn’t believe what he was hearing. “I don’t have a little brother...”

“What?” The awnser put what felt like a million questions in his head. ‘What happend?’ ‘Why isn’t Ian here?’ Where the main questions flowing around his mind. Something was very, very wrong... “I-I put his name in the letter...”

“Wait a minute...” The letter quikly flashed in Barley’s mind, before quikly grabbing the paper and giving it to his father. “Mom said that the last sentence had a grammar error in it...”

As the older elve took his own written letter and read it over, a heartbroken look appeared on his face. “Laurel crossed his name out...” he said in an equally heartbroken tone. 

Then a thought came in front of the father’s mind. “Wait... Barley, how old are you?”

“16?”

The older elve was sure now... something was very very wrong...

It then suddenly clicked in Barley’s mind. The crossed out words, the supposed “grammar error”. It all made sense now. ‘I was supposed to have a little brother?’ kept ringing through his mind, along with questions such as ‘where is he now?’ and ‘what happend to him?’.

“Barley?” His father asked in a sad, but also a bit of an angry tone. “Where is your mother?”

“O-out with friends...”

“Great...” the frustration kicked in a little. Laurel was the only one who knew about this whole ordeal, so no doubt that she has something to do with the burning questions on both the male elves minds. Then something came up in the father’s head. “We once made a family photo when your mother was still pregnant with your brother. Maybe it’s on the attic.” It sounds the most logical, since they kept many old pictures there. “Come along. Oh, and bring the staff with us.”

Barley never really hang around on the attic that much, so this caught him off by surprise, let alone for the fact that his parents have more pictures there. 

Following his father to the hatch in the ceiling where the attic was, the 16 year old felt a small bit of nervousness in his stomach. He had always gotten used to being an only child, but apparently, he was suppose to be a big brother at least a decade before. Barley was once again so lost in his thoughts, that he didn’t even hear his father stepping up the ladder to the attic.

It was when his father cheered “got it!” that Barley snapped out of his thoughts. He looked up to see his father coming down the ladder with a picture in his hands. When he was on the floor again, both father and son took a long look at the picture they had found. And Barley did with his jaw dropped.

On the picture, he saw both his parents and his 4 year old self smiling, appearing to be standing in New Mushroomton, with his mother in fact being around 8 months pregnant at that time. Looking at his 4 year old self, Barley could see how happy he was at that time, how excited he was to be a big brother. The now 16 year old felt a little bit of shame for not remembering that part of his childhood.

“Do we have a guest room here?” His father suddenly asks.

“Uh, yeah.” Barley awnsered, taken a bit curiosity of what his dad’s planning. “It’s across my room, actually.”

“Good.” He said, before walking to the guest room with the picture still in his hands. Confused of what he’s going to do, Barley followed him.

“Dad, what are you doing?” He asked when he stepped into the room, seeing his father sticking the family photo with tape to one of the walls.

“We’re going to see what happend.” He replied surprisingly calm, after he taped the photo. “Can you give me the staff?” Without an awnser, Barley gave the wizard staff to his father. The older elve then pointed the end of the staff with the stone in it to the taped picture. “Okey Barley, I want you to stay right next to me.” He instructed his son, to which Barley did with a confused look on his face.

“Fierus Refi...” he suddenly called out, which resulted into both father and son being slowly sucked into something they both couldn’t see by magic.

“Wait, dad, what are you-?” But barley couldn’t finish his question as they where sucked out of the room by the spell.

•+•

When the 16 year old opened his eyes again, he only saw shades of blue-ish greys around him, as if he was in some kind of space. And he appears to be...what looks like floating?

The first thought that came to his mind was where his father had gone to. Barley looked around him, panickingly searching for his dad that he brought back moments ago.

“Dad?! Where are you?!”

“Barley! Don’t worry, I’m here!” He heard his father call out. Barley focused his attention on which direction his voice was coming from, but he already saw his father flowing towards him.

“W-where are we?” The younger elve asked with a bit of a scared tone.

“Literally in the picture.” His father explained. “Pictures have memories within them, including this one that we’re in now. If we think about the memory or question that we wanna witness, it will be re-played when in the picture. And since your little brother wasn’t born in this one yet, this picture would be a good start.”

The whole explanation had Barley’s jaw drop again, thinking of how cool and exciting it was. But he quikly put those feelings away for later. Right now, they have some awnsers to find.

Then it was quiet for a few seconds, both males thinking about the burning question on their minds. Literally 2 seconds later, they where flying with the speed of light past old memories. As they did, Barley looked at the squares with his family’s memories, only seeing some of them before disappearing within a millisecond.

Finally, the duo find themselves in a hospital room, with a midwife holding a elve child, while the centaurian nurse was busy with an ultrasound. It took a few moments for the two to realize that it was Laurel who was checked for the ultrasound. And that the elve child was in fact a 4 year old Barley.

While the formerly dead elve smiled at the sight of seeing his wive again, Barley didn’t really feel any happiness through the scene, and just prepared for the worst to happen.

Then suddenly, the nurse’s expression went pale, and tried to search for something. When she couldn’t find the thing she was looking for, she became even paler and quikly left the room to find a doctor.

The worried look on his mother’s face didn’t make Barley and his father any better. If anything, the 16 year old already knew deep down where this was going...

The nurse eventually came back with a troll doctor, Laurel already worrying herself sick. The news the doctor had for her would change 12 year later’s outcome, and was the devastating awnser Barley and his father where looking for.

“Mrs Lightfoot, it appears that you have a...” the doctor paused for a moment. “I’m sorry... but your baby is gone...” where his exact words after.

The words of the troll doctor hit straight through the duo’s heart, both just as heartbroken as Laurel, who took a moment to proces the words before she wept.

The nurse then put morphine into Laurel system to calm her down, since they had to prepare delivery. Through the whole ride to the delivery room, Barley and his father followed the riding bed where she lays in, perfectly knowing that she couldn’t see them. As Barley looked at his mother’s expression, he could clearly see that she was devistated, and most of all heartbroken.

The delivery took 14 hours, and those 14 hours where long and absolutely heartbreaking.

When he was finally out, Barley’s mind decided to start processing what had just happend. ‘He had been miscarried...’ his mind kept repeating over and over again. ‘He didn’t even got a chance to live...’.

And oh thank god that the doctor brought the stilbirthed baby back to his mother. Both Barley and his father took a look at newborn baby. He had the exact same shade of blue as his mother, and an head full of dark blue curly hair. He obviously looked like his father.

The fact that he wasn’t even moving broke both male elve’s hearts...

“Mommy! Mommy! Is he here?” They suddenly heard behind them. It was Barley’s 4 year old self, being all excited for meeting his baby brother.

‘How couldn’t have I remembered this?!’ The now 16 year old thought to himself, feeling even more shame.

Laurel then got carefully on the floor, still holding her newborn baby. “Wanna hold him?” She asked softly, to which 4 year old Barley excitedly nodded. She then placed the curly haired baby into his brother’s arms.

But then something strange happened. While the 4 year old was holding his baby brother, magic started to pass through his arms.

“Wait a minute...” dad Lightfoot said, seeing the event right before his eyes. Then a quik memory flashed into his mind. “Y-you weren’t born with magic...”

“What?” Barley doesn’t seem to understand what his father was talking about. “But how can I use the staff then?”

“He passed them on you...” the man said with an surprised tone. “Your little brother passed his magical abilities onto you...”

Before Barley had the chance to proces his father’s words, they where both sucked out of the memory. Time was apparently up, and they where at the same speed passing previous memories, and eventually entered a white portal.

•+•

Both father and son landed on the floor of the guest room again with wizard staff and all, being apparently transported out of the picture.

For a few moments, there hang a silence full of two processing minds in the room.

“He had been miscarried...” Dad Lightfoot said in a heartbreaking tone, breaking the silence. “Ian had been miscarried...”

It caught Barley a bit by surprise that his father said his brother’s name just now, but it didn’t really matter right now.

He could’ve had a brother... he could’ve had someone who he would count on, who he could set an example for, who he could’ve been there for no matter what...

But all of that had been destroyed 12 years ago...

Then the magic-passing moment flashed into Barley’s mind. ‘Ian was suppose to have magic...’ he processed. ‘But he didn’t even got a chance to use them, so passed them to...me?’

Then Barley looked at his father, who was sitting on the floor just like him. 

The realization then hit him. If Ian didn’t pass his magic to him, then their father wouldn’t be here right now...

‘Ian gave me a chance to meet dad...’ Barley smiled at his dad as he went through the thought in his head. 

Barley was suppose to have a little brother, but Ian had given something to him that his big brother would be forever thankful for.

**Author's Note:**

> Boi was that a ride...
> 
> Oh, for the ones who don’t know: Ian’s full name is Iandore, but They mostly call him Ian.
> 
> I hope you...uhm... liked it? *sniff*


End file.
